Sweet, Stormy Escape

Since I'll be MIA for the next few months - I'm hoping it's only months, not years - I took a little trip down our little, cozy island to bid my "hi's" and "bye's" to some of my super extended family members. It wasn't as bittersweet as I hoped it'd be, owing I guess to my already being MIA for the past years. However, this short little trip reminded me of my upbringing and kept me even more deeply rooted to the ground that I've been standing on for the past number of years of my existence. It was a humbling experience.

Left for Leyte at around 9pm of Sept. 21, 2012 and arrived around 3am the following day. Of course, I didn't get much sleep since sleeping on a boat was rather uncomfortable so I busied myself with reading. A lot of reading. But I kept surprising myself at how I've gradually developed a sort of immunity to sleepless nights - probably since I've had lots of these in the past decade and a half. It was somehow comforting finding myself still well rested despite the barely 2-hour sleep that I've gotten in almost 36 hours.

Arriving early in the morning meant no one to greet us a warm welcome, but that was exactly how I wanted it. I was never fond of the almost-grand welcoming we most often receive during our all but rare vacations. All the hustle and bustle was just too much for my highly introvert personality.

However, I was fairly surprised when,at 4am, we caught my aunt in the middle of decorating a cake and finishing up a dessert (meant for the guests that would arrive later that day for my Lola's death anniversary, one of the reasons we did go home). I remember vaguely wondering how early she'd woken up before shaking it off as a passing remark. I was so engrossed with cake decorating that I even had some time to imagine how I would decorate it if I were the one making it. Baking has always been a...passion that I never got to hold on to. My being just a few feet away from the beach was all but forgotten. Also, it didn't help that the weather wasn't cooperating. A storm was coming, so to speak. So the day was dark, raining, dreary and kind of gloomy. An atmosphere fit for a death anniversary, I guess.

Making buko-lychee salad. I'm not sure if I got the name right though. ^^

The makings of a chocolate marble cake.

But the sun did shine, somehow, and every now and then, a little ray of sunshine hit the beach and the sea shimmered with its glorious presence. I've forgotten how much I missed the place. I immediately succumbed to my reminiscing.

The place was so much more different than I remembered. The sea has already taken half of our land (about 2 hectares of it, I was told) and that fact left a stinging pain I couldn't get away from. All this could have been prevented had my ancestors known and prepared a riprap for the beach back when they could afford it. Now, I felt a hollow feeling of discontent realizing how much we and our forefathers lost, how much of their hard-earned land was now washed away, and how much of their hardwork ended up fruitless.

This ancient burner/fireplace of some sort has been here as far as I can remember.

What has become of our once beautiful ancestral house. Now a rundown , neglected building. I can imagine myself designing the place. The walls have been there for half a century without any signs of wear.

My favorite reading spot. Just 5 feet from the sea. This used to be really far from the shorelines. Now, the sea has almost taken it from us.

Newly-built (and still quite unfinished) tree-house.

The new cozy little cottage we have replacing our old ancestral home.

The beach. Our beautiful view every morning.

Most of these trees and those beyond them were planted personally by my grandfather.

I listened as my mum told me stories of the adventures and misadventures they had as a child, of the amazing feat that my grandparents, grandfather especially, and those before them had done to preserve the land and the present battle we now have to protect it from...misguided neighbors. She told me that this huge piece of land has been my great-grandfather's for nearly a century (since 1913, to be exact), and who knows how many more years before that in my forefather's name. It angers me to think of how much was thrown away, intentionally or otherwise. And I resolved to do what I can to help preserve what is and will forever be our ancestral home. The place where my forefathers and those before them had settled and created the future for which we are now living. I could only hope I would do so much good, for mine and my future's future.

Moving on, we spent the day entertaining guests, bidding them welcome, chatting, smiling, all that social drama. Or at least my parents and aunt did. I kept to myself, surveying the beach, the houses, the people, and well, most of the time, I just read a book. The place and the cottage was a great atmosphere for reading. No distractions except for the calming waves and the cool breeze (although, this time, it was less of a breeze and more of a cold wind). I reunited with my lolo and lola (half-siblings of my biological grand[s]), and I'm pretty sure my recent endeavor with them is sure to leave a big hole when I leave. But that didn't matter because I missed them so.

Lola Aurea

Lolo Bidak

House (or should I say, Cottage) blessing

Visiting my grandparents' grave.

Laying down some flowers for the dead.

Epitacio's Bakeshop, Bato Branch. Can't get enough of their orange bread! ^^

Racks-full of soon-to-be-baked bread.

Sometimes, one can't help but be vain. ^^

My favorite reading spot. If you're wondering where my book is, it's right underneath the camera, for support. ^^

A little jog down the beach at dawn.

The day went by in a blur. It was too fast that it ended as abruptly as it had come. Next thing I knew, I was in bed contemplating of the return trip tomorrow. And the return trip wasn't so bad. It was just that I had forgotten how much I missed the place that the time we spent there didn't seem enough. However, we had to leave if I was ever going to get all the things I needed to do done before take off. Not to mention we have just a little time before the storm hits and we get stranded. So we had to leave. And as soon as I left, I missed them and the terrible aching that I've subconsciously been keeping to myself in the past years is now stronger than ever. I could only pray that the place, and the people in it survive the times just enough for me to have the capacity to help. It's a dream that I am genuinely committed to and a dream that I will make sure will come true.

xoxo

~hny~